By On & Dave Mekahel Cederberg
Compromise is something that we usually claim to know about a whole lot more than we put into practice in real life. Compromise not only involves listening, but actually hearing what is being said and tuning into the other person’s frequency. It provides an opportunity to show empathy and commitment when placing your partner’s wants and needs above yours. To the opposite effect, compromising also gives people the space to speak their mind and heart as their unique self. Opinion – the ability to compromise is a highly valuable skill that enriches your life. Fact – compromise is not just the decision to give in, but rather a form of communication; sometimes brief or extended dialogue that has the potential to strengthen relationships in different ways. We are firm believers that the great balancing act (the Spark Notes version of compromise) is what keeps our relationship solid and livelihoods in check. Whether we are compromising with ourselves or each other, the potential for growth can be priceless.
We both share in our abilities to compromise. On is oriented more towards stating out loud what he wants and not backing down until he gets it – a theme that is consistent within his professional and personal life as he has a plan and idea that he strives to adhere to. Simultaneously, On is quite good at compromise. A consistent example is the time and effort he puts into understanding without even having to ask. His intuition is freakishly impeccable. Dave is more passive and relaxed, a chill type that sometimes even finds solitude in not having to make a decision, as he can be overwhelmed with information and options. For him, simplicity is key. On the other hand, he also becomes super passionate and refuses to back down on issues that are near and dear to his heart – he definitely loves a good boundary.
A favorite aspect of compromise for us is that it provides a chance for us to show our love, taking action on our words and feelings. It is easy to tell our partner how much we love and adore them, but when we engage in empathy and compassion, putting the other first, it strengthens the foundation of the relationship as it promotes security and trust. The “giver” and the “receiver” both end up winning through compromise when patience, consideration, and understanding unfold.
As human beings, feeling like we are heard and understood is important to the well-being of a relationship. Closed mouths don’t get fed, so if you want to be heard, you gotta speak up. There is a reason why compromise is often referred to as an “art form.” This is because the dialogue that surrounds compromise is a push-and-pull, give-and-take song and dance that, when successful, lands somewhere delicately in the middle. This is not to say that every compromise will be a perfect conclusion, or that every solution involves compromise. As with any form of art, practice makes (almost) perfect. So, the next time 2021 brings you the chance to show your boo-bear/honey just how much you care, bust out the yoga mat because showing some flexibility with your approach might start the year off on the upward trend everyone is looking for.