By Steven O. Evans, PhD
Many of you have probably already seen her through the online video show, FayWhat?!. Yes, she’s sassy, brassy, and classy. But as a colleague and friend, I can attest that Fay Albernas is one of the sweetest, nicest, and most genuine people I have met. She’s “out” everywhere, has more energy than FP&L can measure, and brings a smile to everyone she meets.
I sat down to talk to her to get the Fay-Who behind the FayWhat?! (be sure to get the ? and !)
Dr. Steven: Tell us about you. Who is the Fay without The FayWhat?! Show?
Fay: I’m a Colombian lesbian from Miami, originally from New Jersey. You can probably hear the mix in my accent. I absolutely adore my gay boys—I can’t live without them! Hosting events and being on stage with a microphone is my absolute honor. I have a deep love for fashion and dogs. Celebrating nine years of sobriety, I vowed that if I made it past three years, I would make my recovery journey more public to help those who might be struggling. I spend most of my time in Wilton Manors because our GayBorHood is everything. I am a breast cancer survivor and not afraid to have my opinion.
Who is Fay? What makes Fay feel her complete self?
My “Gay Boys” make me smile and keep me grounded. They range in age and specialties. It’s like Noah’s Ark of Gay Boys, each more amazing than the last. They are heads of amazing nonprofits, leaders in our community, owners of restaurants, creatives, yoga leaders, and marketing icons. They make me want to be a better me. They are fabulous yet commanding, nurturing but stern.
Drag Queens – when starting The FayWhat?! Show, I wanted to make sure I could spotlight Drag Queens. They have the stage presence I hope to have each time I’m on stage. Drag Queens are the funniest and hardest-working friends you will have. You don’t see them enough because they are always working or beading and stoning outfits. They inspire me to the core daily.
The Women around me are superstars and they make me want to be a better me. From my wife Teresa AKA #MyCuban, who just became a PMHNP. I have no idea what all those letters mean but she’s smart. My bestie Michelle Cuartas is an ally and reminds me daily that not all straight people hate us. She advocates for “breaking” the mental health stigma. Adriana Tender constantly reminds me to do a “Finding Nemo” and just “keep swimming, keep swimming.” I am blessed to be surrounded by smart people. One of my best friends, Dr. Khalid (Kal) Gajraj (OutClique cover November 2020), is my go-to for anything and everything. He can give me a pep talk or tell me I did a mediocre job while pointing out that I wore the wrong shoes. He’s a gift.
My Sober Friends – You know who you are, and there’s more of us than you think. Yes, you can go to Gay Days and not be messed up.
Unity on the Bay – My spiritual home. Where I find my balance. Spirituality and my UOTB family is very important to me. They helped me through Cancer and sobriety.
What they all have in common is that they all respect my sober journey, and that fact means everything to me!
I love to be dressed up! People often stop me at events to ask about my outfits, which is funny because 99% of what I wear has been worn by someone else before. I love shopping at thrift stores and finding a bargain. #FayShionista I love being a girl and everything that comes with that. I never feel bad about being the one “overdressed.” That word shouldn’t exist. And what surprises folks is that I dress for ME, not for you. It makes me happy. I am a BossLady when I feel cute. In Spanish, there’s a saying “Mejor Muerta Que Sencilla.” Better dead than basic. And boys remember everything I wear, so no, I rarely wear the same dress twice. Thank you, Rent the Runway & Goodwill. (Bet you can’t pick which dresses are from where?)
I love being at events and getting my pictures taken, but don’t take that the wrong way. For as many days as I am “out” representing our community, I’ll take three days when I want to be home with my wife Teresa (#MyCuban) and our pets Padme & Luke and two cats, Kai & Peppa. (Gotta have cats! I am a lesbian). And, when I’m feeling down, or had a tough day, I usually wear pageant crowns around the house.
So, to be clear, in no particular order, “Fay” = Gay Boys, Drag Queens, Pets, Spirituality, Sobriety, Shoes, and Dresses.
Dr. Steven: How and why did you become FayWhat?!
Fay: I tend to speak very fast and very loudly! So many times, my friends would have to say, “Fay…What???? The F are you saying?” And it kind of stuck. And it came with a chant, “FaaaaayWhaaaaaat??”
Dr. Steven: How did The FayWhat?! Show come to be, and what inspired the idea behind it?
Fay: The FayWhat?! Show began in my second bedroom in my home in North Miami during the COVID-19 pandemic, on 9/11/2020. As an extrovert, COVID was especially challenging for me as I was climbing the walls. I attended many AA meetings and social events online, but it wasn’t the same. I missed my community and needed an outlet to connect with the LGBTQ+ community desperately.
Having been a “Fag Hag” since I came out of the womb, I also wanted to talk to gay boys about their experiences and relationships. For the trans community, I wanted to address the alarming rate at which Trans Women were being murdered. For the lesbians, I wanted to celebrate and discuss our culture. I didn’t want to focus on just one letter of the acronym; I wanted to talk about all of it—the good, the bad, and the scary.
After one year of filming at home by myself mostly, I was offered to move my show to a local online platform where it’s presently filmed and streamed. The FayWhat?! Show became my way to reconnect with and support my community during a time when physical connections were limited.
Dr. Steven: What kind of content do you make, and what do you love most about creating it?
Fay: “Naked Men in Bed” is always fun to film! Yes, I am a lesbian, but I have always admired beauty, and gay boys are just freakin’ beautiful. It might sound silly, but there’s so much content in our community, and most of it is fabulous. From concerts to festivals, musicals to art shows, our community has the most fun and the most amazing LGBTQ+ talent, and I get to be a part of all that. Sometimes, I just want to twirl around in a dress, and I enjoy that too!
Dr. Steven: What’s one of the most memorable videos you’ve done and why does it stand out to you?
Fay: For Pride Month 2024, I hosted CommuniTEA at the Arsht Center for the Performing Arts featuring Alex Newell. They were incredible. I asked them about coming out as gender nonconforming, and they smiled from ear to ear and said, “I do it for THEM,” pointing at the audience.
Dr. Steven: How do you get ready for your videos, and what does your creative process look like from start to finish?
Fay: Ready? I was born ready. I get so happy when I know I am about to film content or get on a stage. I get nervous each time too. It’s part of the process. Thank goodness I have good people around me that help me “SNAP OUT OF IT” (Cher in Moonstruck line). I have key people who call me on my stuff and always keep me accountable. These are also the same people I tell my ideas and jokes to. If they laugh, I know I did my job. My beautiful brother from another mother, Tony Lima (OutClique Cover March 2022 and March 2023) from SunServe, believe it or not, he’s not easy to make laugh. When he laughs out loud, I am a happy lesbian. He’s always a good test. He’s a teddy bear at heart but will also not be afraid to tell me about myself and does often!
Dr. Steven: What challenges have you faced as an online video personality, and how did you overcome them?
Fay: There can be many. Creating content is a full-time job. Time is not on your side, and there’s always new content coming, so you have to be quick and timely. There are a lot of moving parts to having an online presence. And like many content creators, you are doing everything yourself (hair, makeup, writing, producing, editing, posting, scheduling) then immediately start all over with the next piece. Helping other content creators is good karma. My initial “challenge” is that I am a “girl” putting out content for all. The viewer has to give me a chance to like me.
Dr. Steven: How do you connect with your audience, and what do you do to keep that connection strong?
Fay: People say, “you are everywhere.” Yes, I am. That’s part of my job. I love hearing people say they resonate with something they saw online or they enjoyed an event I hosted. That’s how I connect. When I host big events, I leave backstage and hang out with the folks who are there to enjoy. I want to feel their energy and see if they are truly having a good time. That energy stays present. Walking into an LGBTQ+ crowd and just feeling the energy – it’s magic. But you don’t get that magic without the audience’s trust.
I’ve noticed that more and more event organizers are acknowledging that not just anyone can host an event and that a host is very important to the flow of an event. It’s not as easy as it looks. The people have to trust the emcee. Without trust, you’ve lost the audience. They must trust that you know what you are talking about and that by following the emcee’s lead, their time will be elevated. That trust is something I have slowly worked for and believe I’ve achieved within our LGBTQ+ community.
I know the looks I initially get when I step on an LGBTQ+ stage – “Why is this straight girl on stage with a mic?” Well, because that Latina lesbian in a harness and a prom dress is going to guide you through this show, laugh with you, and enjoy the talent with YOU, the audience.
I get a lot of, “I thought you were straight!” which, by the way, straight people, is not a compliment. “You don’t look gay” is not a compliment. And what does that even mean?
I have been able to host for many different demographics, and I love that. From leather to lesbians and everything in between, I am there.
Dr. Steven: What are your big goals for The FayWhat?! Show and your future in digital media?
Fay: I want to take over the world! (Ala Madonna) I want a bigger audience and to show more people how wonderful it is to live here and be queer. Even with the current political climate, life is beautiful here. I love Richard Gray and Stacy Ritter at Visit Lauderdale; they inspire me with their vision of “Everyone under the Sun.” That’s what we see and LOVE here – Everyone!
I want to reach folks who don’t feel seen or heard, and even those who might never see the U.S. or a “queer” city like Wilton. I want to help break the stigma around asking for help. Mental health is not addressed like it should be in our community and we are losing many people to addiction and mental illness. I want people to learn about and understand the tough journey of the trans community, especially the BIPOC trans community. I want to unite the L & the T.
I catch myself watching shows and thinking, “That can totally be me.” I didn’t see myself on screens growing up, so it’s a beautiful thing to see the possibilities now. I have been on an awesome ride the last few years, and I am excited about what else the universe has in store for Fay Albernas and FayWhat?!
I’m beyond excited to announce that I’m working with Wilton Manors resident Danna Davis, Candis Cayne, and Mary It’s Mary Productions on a few projects. I’m also collaborating with the Wilton Drive Improvement District on an upcoming event.
Dr. Steven: What tips would you give to someone who wants to start their own online show?
Fay: Look around. There’s content everywhere. Use your friends. Who makes you laugh? Use that person. Remember, our calamities or difficulties can be hilarious. So stop crying about it and use these feelings for content. There’s no one else like you. Use that.
Dr. Steven: If you could do anything else, what would it be?
Fay: I enjoyed being a bartender. I know a few sober bartenders. Well, not so weird. There are a few gay boys who are my close friends and are sober. Maybe a stripper? I see the boys doing it and think, “I can do that.” (Not really.) Mayor of Wilton Manors? No, that’s a tough one. Something in the pet & animal world. There are so many poor animals that need help.
Dr. Steven: What’s one thing you would like for our readers to know or remember about FayWhat?! Albernas?
Fay: I’m so thankful for all the gifts the LGBTQ+ community and all its leaders have given me. I am allowed to be me wherever I go, and I am very well aware of the privilege that is.
I am constantly learning, and I allow the people who came before me to teach me something I don’t know. We are being erased at every corner; without the stories and the sharing of knowledge, we are doomed to be wiped off history. Remember about FayWhat?! – That I don’t take any of the LOVE for granted. I appreciate every time I get to serve our community.
Dr. Steven: Thank you for all you do for our LGBTQA+ community. We love watching you. Your energy has made such a positive impact!
